Author: Alyx Effron

Recovery has a way of creating open space. When one behavior is removed or slowed down, something else often rushes in to fill the gap. Sometimes that replacement looks healthier on the surface – more acceptable, more productive, more socially reinforced. But that doesn’t always mean it’s harmless. Social media is one of the most common places dopamine relocates. Likes, views, comments, followers, engagements – they deliver fast feedback and instant gratification. The brain doesn’t

This week began with heartbreaking news, and it’s understandable if it’s been sitting with you since. A 25-year-old NFL player, Rondale Moore, died by suicide. Young. Talented. Successful by every external measure. And still hurting enough that the pain became unbearable. Stories like this shake people because they challenge a belief many of us quietly carry. That money fixes things. That success protects you. That fame insulates you from depression, anxiety, loss, or despair. Those

Fear is one of the most powerful forces in addiction. Not because it reflects reality, but because it convinces us it does. FEAR is often used as an acronym for “False Evidence Appearing Real”, a lens that closely mirrors how addiction distorts perception. When we’re in active addiction or deep in compulsive patterns, fear doesn’t show up as panic. It shows up as urgency. The fear of missing out. The fear of falling behind. The

There’s a version of positivity that helps us move forward, and then there’s the kind that rushes us past what we’re actually feeling. Toxic positivity isn’t about optimism itself. It’s about bypassing reality. It shows up when pain gets minimized, reframed too quickly, or quietly dismissed in the name of “staying positive”. In the world of collecting, this can sound subtle and familiar. “At least you had fun.” “It could’ve been worse.” “Don’t dwell on

Active addiction rarely just harms us in isolation. It shows up in our words, our reactions, our broken promises, and the fractures caused when we disappear instead of showing up. Burned bridges aren’t always dramatic explosions. Sometimes they’re small cracks that add up over time. Defensiveness. Manipulation. Lying. Gaslighting. Silence. And when we finally slow down enough to see it clearly, the weight of that awareness can feel overwhelming. Step 8 of The CMD Recovery

During the throes of active addiction, I told myself I was always playing to win. That was the story I clung to. But looking back honestly, I can see something much darker underneath it. I wasn’t just chasing wins. I was chasing the chaos that came from being down. Down bad. Getting myself into a massive hole created an overwhelming sense of urgency, and that urgency delivered a rush that a clean win never could.